You will have significant experiences. I hope that you will write them down and keep record of them, that you will read them from time to time and refresh your memory of those meaningful and significant things. Some may be funny. some may be significant only to you. some of them may be sacred and quietly beautiful. Some may build one upon another until they represent a lifetime of special experience. - President Hinckley



Friday, August 6, 2010

Enough Already!

So I have vented and fumed and puffed smoke about how much I don't love our financial life right now, but today is a build up of all the frustration from the last post (whenever it was) until now.

I have had the same workout shoes for about 2 1/2 years. When you work out like I do ( 3-4 times/week ) you should change your shoes at least once a year. I have been having the worst knee and shin pain it brings me to tears. I finally realized that heck! it really could be the old shoes I am working out in. So I did some research on the internet to find out what kind of shoes are accomodating for people like me with knee pain....I wasn't surprised to find out that New Balance came out on top. So, today I went to the New Balance store told them what I found online and tried on some shoes. They are heaven - I even tried some orthotic inserts as well....(wow!)...anywho....shoes (good shoes) are not cheap...but I can't stand this pain any longer....tears I tell you on a daily basis over knee and shin pain (maybe depression plays in slightly...). I broke down and bought the recommended cross trainer and the inserts - this was after I spent time trying on a few different pair and watching Dallin pull the manican over and it broke all to pieces....(yes I was so desperate I took all 4 of my kids with me to get shoes).

My point is, I knew I needed a pair of good shoes....I don't handle chronic pain well. Problem is, how do I pay for them? Seriously, I can't even buy my own food...at this very moment paying my rent is on the back burner b/c believe it or not some people don't pay their bills when you render them a service - and I am out of money.

My washing maching is on the fritz...who knows how much that will cost to fix...I got gas today and came home and realized that because I filled the car - the car payment will likely bounce....cool....I am so cool.

Anyway, my point in the shoe, washer, grocery buying, rent paying, bill paying madness is that I don't care to ever be rich - I think I live very simply . I RARELY purchase anything for myself (except 2 weeks ago when I did get a bug man - I couldn't handle the bugs any longer)....and it's so aggravating when you need something ( a real NEED) and it's super stressful to figure out how you pay for it. I don't want wordly things...all I want is simply to be able to pay my bills...maybe go in a store - see a cute shirt or something and not have to always walk away. Hunter needs to socks right now - socks! This should not be stressful - but alas, it is.

This too shall pass - my mom told me it would, but man is it frustrating!

4 comments:

Marie said...

Dood! Wouldn't life be grand if we had enough for our needs right now? Remember the days when we did and yet we still didn't splurge? I've had the same workout shoes for 2 years and I didn't even think that my knee pain & shin splints could be from my shoes. Good for you for buying you some shoes! The mannequin will live (not really, cuz its dead) and Hunter can wear his old socks just a little longer.

Melissa said...

Marie, I feel you pain. there was a time in life when Jacob was staying in from recess because he didn't have a backpack(this was a dumb rule!)...and it was because his old one had died and we didn't have a money to replace it. He didn't tell us. He just stayed in from recess. I remember praying that the money would make it. feeling sad because everything in my house was hand me down and old and being crazy stressed. This was right before I went to work. And then when I went to work and we did have money I had to use it to pay off debt. And it wasn't even fun debt. It was debt to pay for food and diapers and bills. My kids drank pwd milk for months. Hang in there. Keep your spirits up. The time will come again that these will not be your struggles. And know that I had some fabulous friends who let me whine and complain whenever needed!

Heather said...

Oh Marie! I so feel your pain! We are late on rent because the kids needed school clothes - last years uniforms were way too worn and holes in pants don't work for school either do shoes that are too small. I don't even remember the last time I bought myself anything not even sure how we are going to eat next week because we have rent, car payment and all the other bills due and we are pushing the limit as to when they will be turned off! Awww the life! Ask your mom when this will pass because I feel like we have lived like this for the past 11 years! LOL Hang in there!!

The Gibbens said...

Well if I know one thing, it's that your mom is usually right! So it will pass, sometime, some way. I have found a lot of comfort in my scriptures lately- Alma 38:5, "An now my daughter, Marie, I would that ye should remember that as much as ye shall put your trust in God even so much ye shall be delivered out of your trials, and your troubles, and your afflictions, and ye shall be lifted up at the last day." Sorry if I'm the "preachy commentor" that we've talked about :-), but "He" is right even more than mom... love you sister!